blessingsindisguise
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« on: September 29, 2012, 02:14:41 PM » |
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Friend neitlingme called me today.
A family member on her husband's side of the family commited suicide. They will be traveling to the funeral. Today she found out that the parents of DN have decided to plan on being there.
DN has not seen her parents in 4 years.
It is all very complicated.
Prayers please for our dear friend as she sorts this all out.
blessings
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courage does not always roar. sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "i will try again tomorrow". mary anne radmacher
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bijou
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mama bear
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« Reply #1 on: September 29, 2012, 03:03:13 PM » |
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Praying....
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My life is blessed by all of you.
mom to several dd with RAD/some form of adult PD (BPD,NPD,ASPD?)-30's
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Jeannie
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« Reply #2 on: September 29, 2012, 03:35:00 PM » |
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Praying, too.
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Bio-daughters 30 & 28, bio-son now in heaven, dear son 14 (healing from alphabet soup disorder)
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clbmom
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« Reply #3 on: September 29, 2012, 03:47:15 PM » |
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Please let her know I/we am/are thinking of her!
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Truebluemom
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« Reply #4 on: September 29, 2012, 05:16:23 PM » |
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Prayers from me as well. What a difficult time to have to deal with this added challenge.
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ds26 - bio (sweetpea) dd23 - adopted (rad/borderline personality - sociopath) dd21 - adopted (mildly rad, bipolar, fae?) ds20 - adopted (sweet pea)
"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."
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Malina
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« Reply #5 on: September 29, 2012, 09:57:35 PM » |
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Yes, praying.
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mom to two adopted children DD21, attachment "issues" DD15, sweetpea with multiple disabilities
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shelly75
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« Reply #6 on: September 30, 2012, 09:42:40 PM » |
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sending lots of good thought and vibes her way
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BioMom to D (6/16/2000)
dxes include bipolar, fasd , adhd, sensory, anxiety and attachment issues, Recently added personality disorder with borderline features
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justine
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The voice of reason....gone amok
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« Reply #7 on: October 01, 2012, 12:06:36 AM » |
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Thx for the news Blessings...will pray
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bio dd35 freakishly sweet bio ds32 recklessly loving bio ds27 frightfully kind adopted sibling group at ages 10, 6 and 4 worstrad30 adopted at age 10, left family at age 18 ads27 FAE/rad, we're still looking for a conscience, estranged add24 P/A Rad. Unattached, wants the family bene
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Mama Bee
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« Reply #8 on: October 01, 2012, 08:51:13 AM » |
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I will pray.
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Cher
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« Reply #9 on: October 01, 2012, 10:22:35 AM » |
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Oh dear...so sad....and complicated.
I am praying as we speak.
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1= AGD 22,ODD&RAD&BPD&CUTTER&FAE, SUICIDAL,DRUG ABUSER & DRUNK. 1= AGD24, DEPRESSION, DIGESTIVE STRESS Dx, EX-SWP ASTRANGED. BIO SIS TO AGD22. 1 AD40 METH ABUSER 1 AD42 DRUNK, METH/ DOM. VIOL. BIO MOM OF DGD22 AND DGD24. DS32 & DD43 NO ISSUES. 8 OTHER GRNDS/6 GRT GRNDS (UNKNOWN)
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karleen
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« Reply #10 on: October 01, 2012, 08:36:53 PM » |
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Praying here also.
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karleen dw of dh, mom to bio sweetpea ds20 and twin adopted ds18
This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.
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neitlingme
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One tiny step at a time...
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« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2012, 09:59:09 AM » |
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Thank you so much for posting for me, Blessings. The funeral and events surrounding it were very difficult. We (DH and I) decided upon hours of discussion and back and forth, that our children would not benefit at all from this type of funeral. Afterall, a funeral is to pray (we can do that elsewhere) and support the living. We did not want the funeral to be diverted to DN's biological nightmare....I wish we could have made part of the visitation perhaps (when it was slow) but as we didn't trust DN's parents...we didn't attend. We invited the family we wished to see, to our hotel room inbetween visits and for dinner/etc. It was much more pleasant this way. The kids still knew they were grieving, but they weren't miserable. Luckily so. DH was ambushed by them at both the visit and the funeral. They made (or tried very desperately to) it all about them, the relationship with DN and DH ** apparently the boys and I don't exist** They yelled at DH when he told them that DN wasn't ready to, nor did she wish to see them! "WHAT?? WHY??? We weren't that bad to her..." Weren't that bad to her? ? REALLY??? Uh, lets see, three years from DHS to get their crap together, attend parenting classes, anger management classes and drug rehab. ALL PAID FOR BY THE STATE OF FLA!! They had to have a job, maintain it for at least 6 months and have a home for six months, (apt was fine) and attend those classes. THOSE WERE THE ONLY REQUIREMENTS TO GET THEIR DAUGHER BACK HOME!!! They hemmed and hawed for three freaking years. THREE YEARS! Finally the state of FLA got sick of the excuses and whammo, TPR. Normally, FLA only gives parents a year to get it together. THEY HAD THREE! So, when they get on their freaking high horse and say "We weren't that bad" Uh...no. It isn't what you @ssholes DID, it's what you DID NOT DO!!!!
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Insanity is hereditary--you get it from your kids!
2 Bio sons 7 & 9-sweetpeas DN17- ADHD, RAD, Bipolar and possibly FAE SS21-sweetpea (ok, at HKU) with some attachment issues due to divorce--currently enrolled in HKU
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clbmom
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« Reply #12 on: October 04, 2012, 10:18:36 AM » |
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And it's the abandonment that always seems to hurts the most. The message that it conveys is "you're worthless" to me. For a child, it evokes the fear of death.
Not so bad? Devastating.
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Truebluemom
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« Reply #13 on: October 04, 2012, 11:27:49 PM » |
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Yep, denial.....floating aimlessly downriver. Meanwhile the kids are drowning. You all were so smart to manage things as you did.
Glad to see you back, Neitling.
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ds26 - bio (sweetpea) dd23 - adopted (rad/borderline personality - sociopath) dd21 - adopted (mildly rad, bipolar, fae?) ds20 - adopted (sweet pea)
"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."
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neitlingme
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One tiny step at a time...
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« Reply #14 on: October 06, 2012, 09:13:39 PM » |
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Thanks guys. I knew you'd get it.
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Insanity is hereditary--you get it from your kids!
2 Bio sons 7 & 9-sweetpeas DN17- ADHD, RAD, Bipolar and possibly FAE SS21-sweetpea (ok, at HKU) with some attachment issues due to divorce--currently enrolled in HKU
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